And though your confidence may be shattered, it doesn't matter.NY You've just gotta press on. I wrote a long, chronological journal of my weekend that got erased and I've no mind to do it again. I had fun, but it's been a nervous, weird time lately, dealing with bouts of uncharacteristic anxiety and doubts that hit me when I'm at my coldest. I have had a fun semester, but I can't help but believe that when I have the time to sleep and heal that I'll approach things from a different slant, and dwell on the good rather than the sad.
Sarah and I went to see Wilco on Friday. The band was far more folkie than normal, downright trabadourish at times, but still rocked loud enough to make my ears sing. I felt bad for Sarah because everyone around us was so tall that she was unable to enjoy the sightlines that I did. But we had fun. And they played what has sorta become our song, "California Stars;" it was nice just letting the music wash over everything as we kissed. Very romantic, eh? :)
Saturday, I woke with real anxiety, but worked through it. Went to Purdue to hang out with the gang of geeks. I always have fun down there, casting my pretentions aside. Usually Adam D. takes the brunt of the jokes, but Jeff (and his Milhouse pants) filled that role nicely...and I of course took my turn. We played Scrabble and ate pie on Saturday night, watching the Simpsons. We are so cool.
I've got so much to do. I want it to be over, but I know that I'm gonna miss it when it's gone. I'll work to stay busy with the many creative endeavors that I have planned. Laying down all of the songs in my notebook on tape, finishing my current short-story project, reading "Black House" and "The Lord of the Rings" Trilogy, getting in shape, etc...So I'll stay busy. But I should really enjoy where I'm at. It's hard when your perceptions are as f***ed as mine are, but I am really trying.
I've got the greatest friends right now. I'm not gonna get all gushy, but some of you guys are amazing. Not on my level of course, but close enough for toleration I suppose. ha ha. I need ya right now.
Cause the world is turning and I don't want to see it turn away.

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